1. |
Art Thief
03:00
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Late at night when the crowds are gone
I'm in the museum all alone
I see the guards but I have no fear
I'm going home with a souvenir
I'm an art thief
I will steal your Vermeer
Take it far away from here
I'll steal your Caravaggio
Put it in my Van and Gogh
I'm an art thief
I got more busts than a palace hall
I got more nudes than a frathouse wall
I'm in a different country every week
I lead a life of suave mystique
I got some Roman and I got some Grecian
I got some Warhol and I got some Titian
And just for fun one night in Greece
I stole a mosaic piece by piece
There's no alarm that can make me afraid
There is no laser beam I can't evade
The only thing in my life that's hard
Picking the art for my Christmas card
I got a Jaguar that's long and sleek
A different passport for every week
I love going to work each day
It's long hours but it's great Monet
I took the Mona Lisa on a date
Brought her in a couple hours late
Well you see I got the magic touch
Now you know why she smiles so much
I'm an art thief
Dig my black turtleneck
(By Kurt Blumenau, 2013. All rights reserved.)
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2. |
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In a foreign airport at midnight
As you try to find the local word for 'embassy'
In a foreign airport at midnight
Won't you think of me
In a foreign market at midday
As you haggle with a vendor over jasmine tea
In a foreign market at midday
Won't you think of me
Won't you think of me
'Cause I'm dashing and I'm bold
And I smell like the world's nicest cargo hold
And I know how to behave
And I look good in fedoras when I haven't shaved
And my passport may be bare
But it doesn't mean that I don't care
Though the weather isn't beautiful
You know I wish I could be there
In a foreign land as you daydream
In the language of Antonio Carlos Jobim
In a foreign land as you daydream
Dream a dream of me
Dream a dream of me
Sitting in my office at daybreak
Thinking of a thousand things that weren't true
Sitting in my office at daybreak
I still think of you
I still think of you
I always think of you
(By Kurt Blumenau, 2013. All rights reserved.)
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3. |
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Instrumental
(By Kurt Blumenau, 2013. All rights reserved.)
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4. |
Jacks High
03:41
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Ride a penguin on the Fourth of July
John Adams won't forgive you if you do not try
Dump some concrete all over your head
If the penguin's sleeping, ride a sparrow instead
Jacks high
Around Thanksgiving things really got grim
The ferry was in drydock so we had to swim
We filled our pockets with rocks and sawdust
And walked right across 'til gravity caught us
Jacks high
Pull the plug from a barrel of stout
And try to look surprised when the Buddha jumps out
Ask him to tell you all he has heard
But keep your cards close and don't trust a word
Jacks high
So put red socks on your ten-pound goose
Teach her how to shake it all slow and loose
Fill your jug with molten steel
And I will not touch you where you cannot feel
Jacks high
(By Kurt Blumenau, 2013. All rights reserved.)
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5. |
Spanish Bacon
01:35
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I knew a young privateer, gallant and true
He was blown overboard back in seventy-two
I can still hear his voice when I'm on the night watch
Calling 'cut me a piece of that Spanish bacon'
Whoa-oh, Spanish bacon
Hrr frr hrr hrr frr hrr hrrrrrr
I once caught a mermaid in the midst of a gale
Made her my lass for the rest of the sail
But I knew that our union was not meant to be
So I swapped her for ten pounds of Spanish bacon
Whoa-oh, Spanish bacon
Hrrr frr hrr hrr frrr hrr hrrrr
Hrrr frrr hrrrr hrrrr hrr hrr hrrrrrrr
(By Kurt Blumenau, 2013. All rights reserved.)
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6. |
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Who put this beach so close to this package store
That's the kind of ingenuity a man like me can adore
So go to the kitchen and bring the Coke and rum
We'll fill our tumblers with a toast to things to come
You're just 18 and you've never been to LA
It'll be my honor to show you those show business ways
Raise one last glass to that nowhere town you came from
And we'll drain the bottle with toasts to things to come
Well the press says that I'm erratic
But I'm automatic
And babe don't you know
My name up on the marquees
Never fails to please
So let's put on a show
If stories of all of my capers
Show up in the papers
That sort of thing does
And if I wake up all shaky
It's your beauty that makes me
Feel all abuzz
When this film wraps up I might lose a month or two
In this cozy bungalow with no one, baby, but you
We'll snuggle up close while the air conditioners hum
And first thing in the morning we'll toast to things to come
(By Kurt Blumenau, 2013. All rights reserved.)
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